All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

Gorgeous evening.  Pulled my mattress of my bed and dragged it to the back porch and slept under the stars and bright moon.  My fitful sleep rewarded with glimpses of the night turning to day, bats flying around, the moon dancing with clouds, the early break of dawn.  Waking up joyful because of the gifts provided through out the night.  Perhaps it was crazy but I needed to celebrate the cool breeze and cloudless night.

Waking up exhausted, realizing that the mental struggles are driven by a complete lack of rest and relief from the stress.  Moving a million miles an hour always trying to get things done, today my body say NO MORE.  It was a cry I listened to rather than ignoring the obvious signs of impending disaster.

I do not really ever take a vacation and no that I do not have the money to go on a big (or even small) trip right now, but those moments under the sky ...the demanded sleep of today...have shown me that I need to reconnect with my body, the earth, the life I do love.  I think I am going to do something crazy like take an entire week off and put my phone away and join like again.  The challenge to myself is to not only do it, but not to get lost in TV and angst of not being at work and take those days to celebrate.  Mornings at the dog park, a swim, a walk, maybe a show ...the things that I need to feel like me.

Tonight I am going out for a run and am looking forward to it.  I do not know how well I will do but I do not care, this run is just for me.