Day 1 and it already sucks.  I am starving and crashing both.  I want something ..anything sweet.  I have heard it takes 48 hours to get sugar craving out of your system.  This maybe be the longest hours ever.  I am thinking of caramels or jelly beans or a pop tart.  My vegan gluten free broccoli soup was actually good and the nuts are good but I am done with them.  I might have to make another soup to survive the afternoon.  I should have had breakfast but my stomach was a mess from a terrible nights sleep.   The whole eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted it was really nice from one perspective but as I sit here and feel my gut fat folded over - it was not worth that much.

I am struggling with the gluten free thing because I cannot find a really good reason for it if you do not have wheat allergies.  I asked my "cleanse coach" and she recommended I listen to the calls that I missed - which means to me it is not a straight forward answer - otherwise why would you not just write it as a response instead of sending me to a recording.  I googled it and found some people actually think it is unhealthy.  Although really for a few weeks - even if it is "unhealthy" it will not be more unhealthy than I am been eating on my own accord.

In case you missed the things that I am cutting out for 30 days (I already started 2 week negotiations in my head)  Alcohol (yeah read that again).  Sugar.  Caffeine.  Any product from something that has a face.  (Vegan - no cheese (did I write that?)  and Gluten free foods.   I went shopping yesterday for "food" and I felt like I had never been shopping before.  I was shocked at how many things that should be no brainers for Gluten Free or Vegan were not - Soup with eggs for example.  It was also just unfathomable how people who are allergic to Gluten survive.  There is not JACK out there for these poor people.  I because ecstatic when I found the gluten free freezer but quickly released that Vegan added a whole other layer of complexity.  I found fake mac and cheese - not real noodles - not real cheese - just some sort of bastardization of real thing.  What is Tempeh by the way?  The reviews for it are not by a marketing team  "marinate it so you can't taste it" type food.  Yum - sign me up!

I decided to go back to using My Fitness Pal to track my calories and food to see what I eat.  I am also trying this crazy thing on line called Health Month, which is ironically something I created sort of with my friends but never maintain.  The last time I did this with any conviction (the real key) I lost almost 45 pounds.  I only need to lose probably 20 pounds this time so it is totally doable and this cleanse is a step in the right direction.  This week is the week of my body hating everything about myself and next week hopefully is the week I feel better.  I have thrown down that I will do some exercise this week even if it is just Ab Ripper X.  Given my track record, lets see how well I do.  I hate the people on my cleanse list that are all "this was easy" or "doing really well".  Where are the people like me - DAY 1 SUCKS ASS!  (and I am only 8 hours into it).